Would you Display your Sexual Health Status on a Dating App?
Dating and sexual health go hand-in-hand. If you're single and dating, taking care of your sexual health is one of your highest priorities. If you're living with an incurable sexually transmitted infection like HIV, herpes, hepatitis B or HPV, how do you bring up "that" conversation with a potential partner?
Most dating applications don't mention sexual health, but there is one app that is helping to lead the conversation, Grindr.
Grindr app has a health section which gives users the option to disclose their HIV status. You can select your status, last tested date, and even turn on testing reminders. Could this be the perfect solution for those who dread the sexual health conversation?
What is Grindr?
Grindr is a mobile dating app for the LGBTQ+ community. Like most other dating apps, it uses geolocation technology to show users profiles of other nearby users who share similar interests and sexual preferences. Grindr users can chat, exchange photos and videos, and arrange to meet up in person. The app is available for free on both iOS and Android devices, with additional features available for purchase through a subscription service.
How is Grindr encouraging transparency around sexual health?
Grindr has revolutionised the way that LGBTQ+ people connect and date but has faced criticism for its potential to facilitate "risky" sexual behaviour. Its solution for this is to try and educate users and make it easier for them to have honest and open discussions. On the Grindr health section, users can select an option under the HIV status filter. The available options are "HIV-positive," "HIV-positive, undetectable," "HIV-negative," and "HIV-negative, On PrEP."
It's refreshing to see this level of transparency on a dating app, and it could be taken even further. Imagine if we normalised speaking openly about sexual health, and the shame and stigma attached to this topic no longer existed? All dating apps should have the option to show you're up to date with your sexual health checkups.
Of course, there is the issue of how to verify your sexual health status. What's to stop someone falsely claiming they are up to date with sexual health checks? This is where iPlaySafe comes in.
iPlaySafe provides a home STI testing service integrated with an app. After testing, results are available through the iPlaySafe app in the form of a 'play badge'. Results can be kept private, or shared with a potential partner. All you need to do is share your iPlaySafe member name with their partner, and they would be able to check your results. What if dating apps added the feature to include your iPlaySafe member name, or display your 'play badge' on your profile?
How to disclose your status on a dating app
Until a sexual health feature does become available on all dating apps, an option is to mention your status in your bio. Using a "+" symbol is a common way to demonstrate being HIV positive. If that doesn't feel right for you, you will have to disclose your status during a conversation. Telling someone that you are HIV positive (or have herpes, or any other lifelong condition) on a dating app can feel daunting, but it's an essential step in building trust and having honest communication in any potential romantic or sexual relationship.
Disclosing your status is a personal decision, and you should only do so when you feel comfortable and ready. It's also important to prioritise your own safety and well-being and to make sure that any potential partner is respectful and supportive of your status.
Tips for disclosing your status on a dating app:
- Choose the right time: Before disclosing your status, take some time to get to know the person and establish a rapport. Find the right moment to disclose your status so that the person is receptive and open to the information.
- Be direct and honest: When you do decide to disclose your status, be straightforward and honest. Avoid beating around the bush or using euphemisms. Let the person know that you are HIV positive, and provide any necessary context or information about your current health status.
- Keep it simple: Avoid overwhelming the other person with too much information or medical jargon. Stick to the basics and answer any questions they may have. Remember, disclosing your status is just the first step in an ongoing conversation.
- Emphasise safety: Reassure the other person that you are taking all necessary precautions to ensure their safety and well-being. Talk about any treatment you are receiving, and the steps you take to manage your health.
- Be prepared for any response: While it's important to approach disclosure with confidence and positivity, be prepared for any response from the other person. They may need some time to process the information, or they may have questions or concerns. Be patient, understanding, and open to further communication.
Dating and sexual health
The decision to disclose your sexual health status on a dating app is a personal one. Some people choose to display their sexual health status on their dating app profile as a way to be open and honest about their status, while others prefer to keep that information private until they get to know someone better. Disclosing your sexual health status is just one part of a larger conversation about sexual health and safety. You should also be prepared to discuss your sexual history, your use of protection and contraception, and any other factors that may impact your sexual health.
Safe sex is great sex
We've seen health transparency across many dating apps with users being able to add their covid vaccination status following the pandemic, and we love Grindr's initiative to make conversations about sexual health easier. It would be great to see other apps take steps to promote safe sex.
